Neighbors today call the HOA!

Dear MommaHattie.

My name is Nolan. I wanted to know, in your experience at least. Has it become harder to connect with people? I've been around for quite some time, and barring the pandemic, it just feels nearly impossible to connect with a stranger or even my neighbors.

We recently had a newlywed couple move in next door, and I consider myself old-fashioned. So my wife and I brought over some zucchini bread. A healthy option, most people have not had it or have not had it for a long time. It usually hits the spot for lots of people. Or at least, so I thought. My wife went to their front door and gave it a few knocks and, after a while, gave up. I said they were maybe just not home, or they were in the basement or something. My wife eventually tried again a little while later as the bread was still warm, and we still received no answer. She had given up rather quickly, but I was not convinced.

A short time later, the husband came out of the house and walked to our door. I had made my way over to greet him at the door and was shocked to find a note on my porch. "Please do not trespass on our property again, we will call the HOA and the police if this happens again."

What happened to these two in their life that they would come to this conclusion? Did the whole world really change and just leave some of us old folks behind?

I ate their zucchini bread; it was delicious.

Dear Nolan,

I hate to be the bearer of bad news. There are people in the world who, for some unknown reason, are very threatened by bread made from vegetables!

All kidding aside, let us not base "the whole world" on this one neighbor. Sadly, it would seem many neighbors in the world are less than friendly these days. Maybe there aren't more than there used to be, but we, the friendly type, notice it more than ever before. You asked, "Has it become harder to connect with people?" My short answer is a resounding, "YES!" Even well before the pandemic.

I would have LOVED to have you as a neighbor when we moved into our home as newlyweds. I still remember when we bought our home and first moved in, I was so excited in anticipation of a neighbor, any neighbor, coming over, knocking on the door, welcoming us to the neighborhood. Maybe with some zucchini bread. I would have invited them in for coffee or tea, and we would have chatted and laughed. It never happened. Not the way I thought it would. We eventually met some of our neighbors; however, we have lived here for over two decades, and we know very few of the people living in our neighborhood.

Connecting with people was becoming more difficult before the pandemic. I feel the pandemic has intensified the difficulty. I often wonder if we can ever get back to connecting again, regardless of the pandemic. Then I see a story like "Frank the Christmas Gargoyle." Have you heard about him? In short, a neighbor threatened to report this particular Christmas decor to the HOA, and the drama that ensued from there gleaned over a half-million dollars for charities! The anger of one neighbor sparked the humor and creativity of this person, and the world has benefitted from it and, on some level, connected. Maybe connections are just different?

Maybe something did happen to your neighbors in the past that makes them distrustful of strangers bearing vegetable bread. Maybe they are grumpy people. You may choose to mail them a card letting them know you meant no harm and wanted to welcome them, there are no hard feelings, and wish them well. Or you might choose to move on, deciding that you do not need to make this particular connection. I would not take it personally. Their nasty note reflects their character; how you react to it is a reflection of yours. In the end, you got to enjoy the spoils of your labor, and as you said yourself, "it was delicious"!

Love Lots; Smile Often

MommaHattie

#LLSO